You know you’ve picked a great place to go on holiday when a tough-looking Russian oligarch decides to abandon his multimillion-pound luxury yacht for a few days and pop into your hotel instead.
I hadn’t realised all-inclusive meant that paupers like me got to party with millionaires, but Oleg or Boris had certainly made the right decision.
I was in Majorca with my family, staying at the Iberostar Alcudia Park on the seafront at Playa de Muro beach, a 40-minute drive from Palma Airport.
And if you can tear yourself away from the fun fit for millionaires in the hotel, it’s an ideal starting point from which to explore all the island has to offer.
The northern coast, where we stayed, has great natural beauty and 31 fine, white-sand beaches.